Turd On The Loose

Today we went with friends to a puppet show. It sounds innocuous enough, but come on now, how well do you know us?

I should have known to pack up and head home when, as we were walking up to the building, Sterling stooped down to snag a "rock".

She kindly offered it to me, and I realized at that point that I need to have my children around dogs more often. Obviously.

Because nestled hopefully in her little hand was a fairly giant dog turd.

Of course, the moment I went to snatch it from her, she slammed her fist closed tightly around it.

Yay.

After finally convincing her to drop it, and discreetly dry heaving, I scrubbed her hand with a wipe. I'm sure that took care of it. Totally.

We made it to the theater, and spent 30 blissful minutes enjoying the puppet show.

I should have called it as a win there and left, but I didn't.

Nope. 

Instead I went with several of our buddies out to the playground. Which SEEMED like such a great idea. Unless you remember this post, in which case it was utter lunacy. 

When Bennett wasn't playing in the run off water next to the garbage cans...

...or happily sipping out of a DISGUSTING juice box he helpfully "unearthed"...

...or rounding up a lovely collection of treasures to proudly present to me...

...he was running off as quickly as his stubby little legs could go. 

Which is INCREDIBLY fast. As every friend that goes with us to a park quickly discovers.

I cannot begin to tell you the number of times that random people have said "wow, he's one speedy little guy", or "where are the parents of this little guy" as I race to catch up. 

There were four adults in our group today, and between the four of us, we *almost* kept him out of trouble.

Thankfully, the kids also pitched in to help wrangle my little tur... key. 

As my friend A commented, "I don't think the kids will be the only ones taking a nap today". Yep.

I may never leave the house again... without a kid leash. And a bucket of hand sanitizer. And a tranquilizer gun. 

Did this make you snort out loud and now you want more Mayhem? Then please Like us at facebook.com/MomOfMayhem for Mayhem throughout the day!

And tell your friends about us!