You, Me, and Crap

Want an exercise in futility? Try explaining to a toddler the difference between "me" and "you".

The last few days, our conversations have gone something like this:

Sterling: Here momma, put this necklace on me? As she reaches up to put it around my neck.
Me: No Sterling, you are "me". I am "you". When you are putting the necklace on me, you are putting it on "you". I mean "me" are putting the necklace on "you".
S: I put the necklace on "you"? Taking the necklace back and putting it on her neck.
Me: No, now you are putting the necklace on "me". Sterling reaches out to put the necklace back around my neck.
S: "You"?
Me: Yes, now you are putting the necklace on "you". Sterling looks at me apprehensively.
S: You put necklace on "you"? Sterling looks at me in confusion, the necklace hangs midway between us.
Me: Let me help you put that necklace on you. Crap, I mean I am putting the necklace on "Me"I pat her tummy with one hand.
S: Crap.
Me: No, you shouldn't say that.
S: CRAP!
Me: Nope, that's not a good choice. You can say CRUD.
S: You say crap?
Me: Nope, I say crud.
S: No, you say crap momma. Crap! Me say crap!

So in essence, we never did actually clear up the whole "me" and "you" situation, but we DID teach Sterling the correct usage for crap.

Which is almost as good.

Almost...

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